Botox makes you happy!

Another one of those articles saying that Botox improves quality of life.  It's again based on the feedback idea-if you're not frowning your brain thinks you're happier.  I kind of believe it actually.  Before I got my frown/glabellar lines injected I found I was unconsciously frowning all the time and it seemed to prepetuate itself.  Now I sometimes forget how to frown and just don't seem to find myself attempting the movement as much.  If it was free I'm sure I'd be completely ecstatic!

Botox to my glabellar/frown lines....the second time!

It's a week now since I had my second ever Botox treatment.  I was using up a Groupon that I bought for 20 units at DLK and also bought another 5 units.  The initial treatment from Dr Torgerson was 25 units and I ended up getting another 10 a few weeks later because I felt like I was still frowning a bit.
This seems to have worked more completely.  I felt that Diana at DLK injected a little more laterally and really tried to see how I frowned.  I pretty much can't do it now which I hope means the lines will be even softer....and it was with fewer units than the last time!

So, this was just over a week ago-the day of the injection when initial treatment was wearing off:

This is today:

Frowning-

And at rest-

Time for more Botox!

I got my first Botox treatment to my glabellar lines at the start of November (with a little extra a few weeks later).  Prior to trying it I had bought a $99 Groupon for 20 units of Botox at DLK on Avenue.  The voucher expires in April so I thought it should be used!  I don't have full movement back in my forehead yet but it's definitely wearing off.  I even felt like I was getting a tension headache during the week!

I initially thought they weren't going to help me out and allow me to make an appointment by email-it's pretty impossible to make personal calls in work-but they did in the end, thankfully.  The voucher was for nurse administered Botox.  I felt better about that after seeing Dr Kellett on the 16:9 exposé saying that she gets her nurse to do her Botox!   First appointment included a consultation with Dr Kellett though.  Initially I was scheduled for Thursday the 10th but an emergency meant that everyone that afternoon had to be rescheduled.  Luckily Dr Kellett decided to make up for it today (Saturday 12th) and they kindly slotted me in.

The clinic is lovely and on Avenue Rd in Toronto, just a little north of Whole Foods.  Everyone was absolutely lovely.  I filled out the usual medical questionnaire and a consent form.  Diana was my nurse and brought me to the treatment room to wait for Dr Kellett.  I wasn't waiting long.  They were both really nice-very friendly and chatty with a knack for putting people at ease.  We didn't discuss the Botox hugely because I'd already had it.  I asked for 5 extra units (at $12/unit) just to make sure I was definitely treated.  Diana suggested some above my brows to lift them.  I had been vaguely toying with it recently...but decided to think about it a little more first.  I asked her about my lips too.  She thought they were a good shape and colour (thanks Diana!) and said that she uses Botox herself for lip lines...which is the same as a few others (not Dr Torgerson though).  I think I might go for it next time!

The treatment was super quick and barely felt it.  It's obvious that Diana has done this thousands of times.   She gave great post-procedure instructions as well which I didn't get the last time. No more Googling!  Need not have gotten up early to go to the gym...only have to avoid exercise and lying down for 3 hours.

I also asked if I could get some Latisse and they obliged.  I liked it that I actually filled out a questionnaire about my eye health...it's another thing that wasn't covered before.  Dr Kellett and I compared our results.  We both really like it!

I think I'd be happy heading back there for other things-they have a lot on offer including peels, lasers, injectables and Dr Kellett's own line of products.  I liked the atmosphere, it was squeaky clean and everybody was lovely (and very very good).

Here's my "pre" this time.  Better camera (shudder).  Discovered that the lines show up best without the flash:

And soon I'll update my Latisse experience-the 3 month version! I started it on November 16th so sometime in the next few days.  Spoiler: the post will include the importance of an eyelash curler for crazy lashes!

Alternatives to full cosmetic surgery "soared" in 2010

According to this article, more and more people are turning to injectables instead of full cosmetic surgery.  It's seen as a reaction to the recession-people spending less by touching up with fillers and botox instead of getting a facelift.  It's funny that the demand for injectables etc has not only remained during a recession but actually rocketed.  It seems to be a form of the "lipstick effect" where women were known to buy lipstick during economic downturns as a way of cheering themselves up and a small luxury.  Botox and Restylane etc hardly count as the same price range of a tube of lipstick but it seems we have come to think of them as a normal expenditure; much like going to the hairdresser.
I can kind of see how it would be easy to get to really like having the procedures done.  So far I've only had Botox in one area but it's amazing (and quite scary) how it's gotten me looking at myself with a more critical eye.   The surgeon suggested filler in my tear troughs and I can see why.  I'm bothered more by the fine lines around my lips now and would like to plump up my lips a little-especially the top lip which is thinner than the bottom one.  That's not to even start on the liposuction I want!
Will I actually get those things?  Probably not.  It's certainly not economically viable at the moment.  I'm also bothered by how quickly I've become (even more) dissatisfied with my appearance.  Perhaps it's time to stop peering so closely....

Botox to glabellar (frown) lines-results!

I've written about my decision making process in choosing someone to inject me with Botox, the big day with Dr Torgerson and my decision to get a top-up.  It's 6 weeks from the initial injection now and 2 weeks after the top-up so time for a summary!

Why did I get it?
I noticed glabellar/frown lines on my forehead about a year ago.  It was as if they appeared overnight!  I tried home microdermabrasion, facials, every type of cream but to no avail.  They actually got worse.  I felt like I was frowning in my sleep and would wake up in the morning with deep lines.  They were giving me a grumpy look.  They are one of the best areas to treat with Botox.

Where did I go and why?
I went to Dr Cory Torgerson in Yorkville, Toronto.  I wanted a professional to administer it and in a proper medical setting.  I was terrified of complications and while people in salons may do a nice job, I wanted to know I hadn't taken any chances.  I spotted Dr Torgerson at the women's show and thought he looked nice.  He was qualified and did all his own injections-he wasn't just a figurehead.

What was it like?  Did it hurt?
I got a really warm welcome when I went into the office and was made to feel at home.  My nerves almost completely vanished when I saw the place and met the office staff.  I filled out a pretty lengthy medical questionnaire and had some coffee while I waited.  Dr Torgerson was utterly charming and very sweet.  He explained everything, including risks, and I signed a consent form.  He did suggest one other thing-filler in my tear troughs...but that will have to wait until I win the lottery!
The injection was really really fine.  He gave me a squeezy thing just in case but I didn't need it.   He uses a 32G needle which is super tiny.  Obviously, you will feel something when somebody puts a needle through your skin but it was just a scratch.  He did 5 injections-one in the middle just above my nose and then two each side.  The ones at the inner edge of the eyebrow feel strange but not painful.  Just kind of crunchy!  The actual injections only took a  couple of minutes and I was ready to go straight after.

Any side effects?
My forehead felt a bit heavy the evening of the injection.  Kind of like the beginnings of a headache but not painful.  This could have been partly because of being more aware of it!  One fun effect is looking at my forehead in the gym and seeing absence of sweating in the injected area-just proves that it works for hyperhydrosis!

How long to see results?
It was really 5 days before I saw definite reduction in movement.  Before that it was a little less but 5 days was when I really thought there was a difference.  There was gradual improvement up until around 2 weeks though.

Why the top-up?
I could still frown a bit.   Not much but I was afraid the lines wouldn't soften enough.  The areas he had injected directly weren't really moving much but more lateral (outer) corrugators were pushing me into a frown.  Dr Torgerson couldn't have been nicer.  He thought the result was good but gave me a little more anyway just to make sure.  I only had 10 units that time and felt perfect afterwards.

How is it now?
Good!  I still look I can frown.  Kind of.  It's not like my forehead is immobile, but it doesn't come together in the same way.  The lines are much softer-one is barely visible-and I don't look as grumpy.  I actually do think I'm happier now that I frown less!

Would I do it again?
Absolutely.  It's pricey but I definitely want to keep it up if I can.

Any regrets?
Not doing it sooner!  The lotions and potions were a complete waste of time and money.  Could have saved myself a year of staring at my 11s!

PHOTOS:

Pre:

                                          (frowning)

                                           (frowning and lines)

5 days:

Post!

                                           (lines barely visible)

                                           (frowning-lateral muscles trying to move)

                                          (frowning again-blurry but much less movement)


VIDEO:

And this was my attempt at a video to demonstrate how my forehead moves.  Apologies for bad quality-it was on my phone camera....

Super Botox Me

Anybody get Botox for Christmas?  I ask because apparently Simon Cowell gave Botox to his friends as gifts: story here

With my time off for the holidays, I had free time to mess around online.  I came across this documentary, Super Botox Me, which was made for BBC America.  The journalist is 39 and investigates to see what happens when she undergoes nonsurgical cosmetic procedures.

This is the preview:

She definitely looks tired and a bit sad so I suppose she could look better with  injectables.  In the full version there is a segment where model agents and magazine people pick her apart.  It's awful!  I think they would find many more faults with me.

As part of her travels she goes to Dr Frederic Brandt in New York.  Apparently he does Madonna's Botox.  He seems to have some interesting and advanced techniques, including injecting into the neck muscles to tighten the jaw line.  This is called a Nefertiti neck lift in some places.  Would be a bit nervous having that one done!  For some reason I can't find the link when I try to embed it right now, but it's here.  He seems nice and I'd love to go to him because his work on other people seems good...but somebody should definitely handcuff him the next time he tries to do anything with his own face.

This is the worst bit though-Fraxel around her eyes:

The video here doesn't show her when she gets back to her hotel that night and has blood streaming down her face!  She also had to get up regularly during the night to change dressings on her face.  Her eyes did look better after it but it was definitely not an easy option.

You can see the full episode here by downloading the Veoh viewer.  Seems to be fine.

It was an interesting documentary.   She obviously felt she could do with being improved from the beginning-it's not like she thought she was perfect and suddenly got forced into feeling insecure.  She did start to get a taste for it after a few injections though.  I could kind of see how!  She had unlimited funds and could go to whoever she wanted.  They all promised her great things.  It would be easy to get caught up in it.  She hadn't even seen the results of her forehead botox before she was rushing off for some in her neck.

She looks better at the end, definitely.  Most of it is really subtle though, except for her frozen forehead.  She had around 50 injections and Fraxel to achieve it all though.  I wonder how much could have been achieved by doing a different set of injections or less.  How different would she look if she just wore some good makeup?

Still think I'd get a little bit of filler if I had the money...

One month on!

Thought I'd be updating this more often...but it's hardly like anyone is reading it anyway!
Have been bothered by the effect of the Botox since I got it.  Zero side effects; just not sure I've gotten the desired effect.   It's really difficult to know what to expect as a first timer.  I can still frown, but it's not at all as strong as it was.  My worry is that it's still enough to keep the lines showing.  Unfortunately I can't actually ask the person who injected me, but I did manage to get some answers on RealSelf about the expected outcome and whether or not I needed a topup.  Some answers were more useful than others.  Some didn't even read the question.   But it mainly seems like practices differ-some like to completely remove movement, others don't.  One mentioned that it should reduce motion enough to soften the lines.  I really do think it should be better

This is me at a month (and still struggling to capture it properly on phone camera!)

I'm going to email the office and see if they can find an appointment for me.  I could only get in Tuesdays, evenings or weekends for the last few weeks and they said nothing was available.

Now...the Latisse!

I'm still terrified using it every day.  They completely dismissed any worries regarding iris colour change in the office and pointed to one of the assistants with blue eyes who had no issues.  A bit of Googling showed that light blue eyes weren't the highest risk anyway.  My type of eyes are-light brown/green that already contain some brown.  There are also unsubstantiated claims of Latisse-induced iris darkening on some blog comments/reviews etc online.  I know Allergan claim none in the clinical trial but 100 participants in it is nothing.
I've  had some itching and dry eyes with it-mainly the first two weeks.  Part of it could be the dry winter air and all the heating indoors too though.  I tried morning application for a while-didn't make much difference.  I gave up on the enclosed brushes after reading reviews on makeupalley and invested in some disposable eyeliner brushes instead.  They are much easier to handle and apply more accurately.  As for effects?  I'm not sure.  Maybe seem slightly longer when I put on my mascara.  Pics are below...I'm getting better at taking these ones at least:

 Hard to tell!

Next post: teeth that stole Christmas and made me cry, plus planning Christmas away from friends and family!

Day 5 and some eyelash fluttering!

Today was day 5 post Botox.   I spent the weekend frowning away to myself to see if I still could.  The day after I was convinced my nose felt funny but then I realised that it was just slightly itchy and it went away (hello, hypochondria/paranoia).  I really felt very little difference over the weekend.  By yesterday (day 4) I felt that my frown had lessened.  Today is day 5 and I can still frown a little but it takes more of an effort.  It feels like it's a weaker expression too.  I frown less enthusiastically!  I've read that it can take a week or so for the full effects so will see how it goes and whether the effects become more pronounced before I ask about a top-up.
This is day 5:

Hard to tell the effects based on the photo which isn't helped by the harsh daylight and hasty make-up application.

I called into Dr Torgerson's office today to pick up some Latisse.  It's the new big thing in eyelash enhancement!  I remember reading about the drug used in it years ago when it was a glaucoma medication.  They had found that people using Lumigan grew longer lashes.  I was very tempted to get my hands on some having stubby, sparse lashes.  The (rare) side effect of darkening of the iris stopped me though.  Allergan (again) decided to make a formulation for eyelashes though and it's just arrived in Canada so I picked some up from Dr Torgerson's.   It's expensive ($160 for a month's supply-shudder) but I wanted to give it a try.  I've also spent money on plenty of lash enhancers that did nothing at all and saw one priced at $170 in Sephora.  I'd also just been to see an oral surgeon about a dental implant and that looked to be so awfully drawn out, expensive and miserable that I was in the mood for a splurge.
It comes in a box with 60 little applicators packed in 2s.  The idea is to apply a drop from the little bottle and use one applicator for each eye, once a day.
Box and applicators:

I also got a cute bag for it which definitely justified the price :-)

Eyelashes before:

 These frequent photos are making me think I need to pay more attention to my eyebrows...and also that I quite possibly need a nose job.  Nose job won't be happening though!  Sigh.

Also saw Dr Torgerson on Global News 16:9 where they did an exposé on nurses/aestheticians injecting without full supervision and dodgy companies selling Botox online.  Glad I went to a real clinic! This link should work for a while.  It's the "Worry Lines" episode.  Scary stuff!

The Big Botox day

My appointment with Dr Torgerson eventually arrived.  I was terrified.  I'm not usually a bad patient but this really did worry me.  I was volunteering for a medical procedure based purely on vanity.  No medical need whatsoever.  It wasn't going to make me healthier, just a bit less grumpy looking.  And for that I was risking a frozen face and droopy eyes.  Was I crazy?  What would my mother say if she knew?  And why was I spending so much on myself when I should be saving to go home and visit my family?!?

Despite the major butterflies (seriously-they were more like huge flapping bats) in my stomach, I arrived at Dr Torgerson's office.  My nerves pretty much vanished when I met his office staff-Helen and Breanne.   They are so nice and so warm.  It was impossible to stay worried!  Helen is also Irish which was a bonus.  I was given a lengthy medical questionnaire and a cup of coffee and settled down to my form filling.

Dr Torgerson was maybe half an hour late seeing me but the time passed quickly and he was obviously with someone else-not just messing around on Facebook or something!  Helen took my "before" headshots and I waited in a big dentist-like chair in the treatment room.

When Dr Torgerson came in, any lingering fears vanished.  He is immensely likeable and spent the first few minutes just chatting about my work, the move to Toronto and so on.  We then discussed the Botox and he commented that glabellar lines are perfect for it (I think they were the initial cosmetic indication too).  He explained the physiology of action, the duration, what I'd expect during and after the procedure and potential complications.   He likes to completely freeze the muscles involved in creating those lines (which he likes to call "concentration lines") unlike other parts of the face where he tries to retain more movement.  The usual dose he uses is 25 units.  He then said there was one more thing that I might benefit from at some point.  My heart sank.  I'd been dreading the critical eye of a plastic surgeon and the pronouncement that I needed a nose job, a jaw revision, new ears, Botox all over, new lips.  "In fact", I was sure he'd say, "we should just get a refund on this face and get you a new one altogether".  He didn't.  With apologies for being mean and picky, he said that I had "tear troughs"-a fold/hollow at the edge of the eye.  He reckoned it probably looked flatter and I looked more drawn when tired.  I had to agree.  He told me that filler (like Restylane) could be injected to plump it-giving a fresher appearance.  He by no means pushed the procedure-just said it was something to think about.  These photos made me think that he's probably right!  Still can't afford it though.

Anyway, I signed my consent form for the procedure and we got on with it.  His fancy chair can be tipped back and he told me that he uses a teeny tiny needle (32G!) for the injections.  I was given a squeezy Botox toy just in case.  The injections were really fine.  5 of them in total.  Some felt a bit funny-like a crunchy sensation by the inner brow-but perfectly tolerable.  It really is just a little pinch.  I held a little gauze to my head for a few minutes and then was ready to go.  He said it would take at least 3 days to show an effect and that top-ups were free if I didn't see enough of a change.   He also mentioned that they were getting Latisse the following week...which definitely sounded interesting too!

I chatted with Helen and headed out the door.

How did I feel?  Fine.  Can't say there was much of a sensation.  That part of my forehead felt a little fuller than usual and a bit heavy but didn't really bother me.  The tiny marks weren't even visible.  I went home, my Botox virginity lost forever...

Choosing someone to allow near me with a needle...

Having made the decision to go ahead with Botox, I was left with the task of choosing who and where!
The options in general seem to be:

• Doctor who specialises in cosmetic procedures: plastic surgeon/dermatologist/cosmetic doctor
• Doctor who did a course in Botox and does some injections to earn some extra cash (usually a GP)
• Nurse working for a doctor-variable degrees of supervision
• An aesthetician of some sort-spa or salon

I have nothing against nurses.  In fact, I think they're often better at procedures than doctors sometimes-they take more care.  However, when it comes to a neurotoxin being injected into my face, I basically want somebody with all the bells and whistles!

Botox is generally regarded to be safe but there are complications and risks with any medical procedure.  And it is just that.  A medical procedure.  Not a pedicure.

Risks include:

• Spreading to muscles not injected
• Eyelid or eyebrow ptosis (drooping)
• Facial asymmetry
• Difficulty breathing or swallowing
• Flu-like illness
• Local effects: bruising, pain
• Just getting the wrong effect!  Looking "frozen" or "done"

So who to go to?  I Googled around a bit and found it hard to decide.  Some providers charge per unit of Botox-from $10-$15/unit.   The amount they use in different areas varies though.  Allergan (who make Botox) suggest 20 units for glabellar lines but some will use 30 or 35.  And men need more.  Groupon or someone had a $99/20 units special from DLK dermatology on Avenue Road in Toronto but it was a nurse injection and they wouldn't even give information about what times they were available by email.  If you won't email me, I can't be bothered.

I decided to potter along to the National Women's Show in the Metro Convention Centre in Toronto the weekend before last.  Free samples were promised so I paid $14 to go (this grasp of economics may explain my financial issues).  There was a mix of stands-food, travel, beauty, massage...and some cosmetic surgery ones.  I spent a while watching Restylane injections which was interesting and then pottered around a bit more.  One laser centre stand had a hand-written sign offering Botox and saying it was $8/unit.  A woman in a white coat was manning it with a  baby in her arms.  She chatted to me while quieting the baby and then the doctor joined in.  Apparently it's $8/unit if the nurse does it and they were offering something like $10/unit for the show.  They were injecting patients perched on a bench in the middle of the hall.  He took out a crumpled diagram to show me that glabellar lines needed 30-40 units.  I decided to think about it.

They were announcing the end of the show when I passed another stand.  It was larger and looked professional with a surgical chair shielded by a screen.  The doctor could be seen around the side and he waved cheerily when he turned around and saw me watching.  He then went back to work on injecting though and seemed to concentrate completely on what he was doing.  He looked young and friendly so I picked up a brochure.  His name was Dr Cory Torgerson and he was a surgeon who initially trained in ENT surgery and then did further post graduate training in facial plastic surgery.  His practice was all facial cosmetic surgery-rhinoplasties, blepharoplasties, injectables etc etc and located in Yorkville, Toronto.  I browsed the website and liked what I saw.  I also had a look at http://www.ratemds.com/ and the ratings were mainly positive (some a bit tooooo positive, a couple unhappy; overall very good).

I decided to email the office and see what they said.  One of my first questions was "who does the injections?" and then if there were any openings on the Thursday and the cost.  The response from Breanne was rapid.  Dr Torgerson himself does all the injections.  She said I could pop in for a consultation that Thursday at 12.15pm.  Consultations are always free.  Their Botox is also per area-$300 each.

I liked the rapid reply, the friendly tone, the fact that he does all his own injections and the free consultation so I decided to go ahead.  Breanne even patiently dealt with me changing my mind about the time the next day when I asked for a later appointment instead.  Had completely forgotten a midday work meeting. 

I read Botox horror stories while waiting for the day to arrive and asked cosmetic doctor Twitter friends (@EternalYouth and @DrRaviJain) if I'd be frozen after it.  Eek!

Braving Botox

If you read any magazine/newspaper/website or watch Desperate Housewives on even an occasional basis, it seems like Botox is everywhere and on a par with brushing your teeth as part of a grooming routine.  We've all heard of Botox parties and even some scary stories of people buying it from Ebay-one of whom was injecting her teenage daughter: scary!  There are also many many examples of bad Botox-like most of the cast of Desperate Housewives, Lisa Rinna, Nicole Kidman...and that cat woman, Jocelyn Wildenstein:

OK, granted, she had a LOT of surgery to look that way...but she's definitely a cautionary tale.

Maybe I think of things a little differently being Irish.  I know many people at home do get Botox but it's definitely not as open as it is here and most wouldn't admit to it.  It is kind of seen as vanity.  And an expensive vanity!

I've been considering it for years though-initially for a deep crease in my forehead, but that seems pretty static.  What has bothered me more over the past year though are my frown lines.  They're also known as glabellar lines or 11s.  I feel like they appeared overnight!   One morning I looked in the mirror and there they were.  I tried various lotions/potions/scrubs.  I must have been frowning a lot because they got worse if anything and sometimes I even woke with a frown on my face.  The lines gave me a frowny and perpetually perplexed expression.  It went beyond looking my age (or older) and made me look grumpy and unapproachable!

I read and I pondered.  I gave it a year of watching them get worse before deciding to go ahead and try it all at least once.

Before pics (frowning):

Cringe-worthy.  Particularly my pores.  Yikes!  They may have to be addressed.  Gives some idea of my frown though.